tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-53594866757579208982024-02-18T21:51:47.160-06:00Gringa on the Ground: A woman whose heart could only be captured by a whole nationThis blog is a journal of my work in the country of Guatemala.Annalisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08247872560777950844noreply@blogger.comBlogger157125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359486675757920898.post-12195679624515789742017-03-30T17:51:00.003-06:002017-03-30T17:51:55.544-06:00A Label I'm not Fond ofCan we do away with the label "Third-World Country?" What it really means is that a democratic country's main form of income comes from agriculture. "Third" sounds really bronze medal-y, like it needs to improve. Head's up, folks, but the US (and other "First World Countries") don't provide enough food for the people who live there! Without these third-place countries, y'all would probably start crumbling...or starving. How about "Agriculturally-Driven Country?" It's much clearer about one's position without confusing anyone about how "good" a country is. I think I'm going to use that from now on.Annalisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08247872560777950844noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359486675757920898.post-22452399522287628432017-02-24T17:48:00.001-06:002017-02-24T17:48:05.833-06:00A Logo for EcE!So, a while back, I was considering a logo for Educacion con Esperanza. However, because I run on a very tight budget, I considered it to probably not be a possibility for the near future. Enter Daniel Stone. Daniel and his daughter Madeline came to stay with me in August 2013. We went on some <a href="http://gringaontheground.blogspot.com/2013/07/introducing-kindred-hearts-and.html" target="_blank">wonderful adventures</a> out in Solola. Christina--Daniel's wife and Madeline's mother--and I have been in contact regularly and we are friends on Facebook. (Usually I visit their family when I am up visiting my parents.) Christina saw my logo woes and mentioned them to Daniel who said, "I can do that!" So, a few months and a couple edits later, Educacion con Esperanza has its official logo! I'm so excited, and I'm so grateful to Daniel and Christina.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHWPGXo1xepWBeFGH1ECoF40lYdzanO53FufZacVOR2ohIK2hKvjBkxcmYU4xagxCPCZdAq3bY9j2ciUv6c0pBxg9VQo8tQAZrIYpB7kAvuk01y2PdNjAJ44Ktf86pw1EKzy6K4QM/s1600/logo.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHWPGXo1xepWBeFGH1ECoF40lYdzanO53FufZacVOR2ohIK2hKvjBkxcmYU4xagxCPCZdAq3bY9j2ciUv6c0pBxg9VQo8tQAZrIYpB7kAvuk01y2PdNjAJ44Ktf86pw1EKzy6K4QM/s320/logo.png" width="255" /></a></div>
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It is not what I had originally pictured in my mind, but it shows the mission of EcE which is "to promote the success of the next generation through a good education and healthy choices." Again, a big thank you to Daniel for the time and effort he put into this!</div>
Annalisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08247872560777950844noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359486675757920898.post-88968178693800196772016-11-01T08:34:00.000-06:002016-11-01T08:34:11.068-06:00Mission Moment: November<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
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October was a difficult month emotionally on both a personal and a professional level. After six years in Guatemala, I attended my first funeral (the older brother of a student); two days later, I attended my second (a family member). The second funeral caused me to delay my visits with interviewing new families by a day.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">These visits were in a community where I had lived previously. We conducted the visits over two days (and still have about three families to visit who had scheduling problems the days we were doing the visits), and the second day we got up into the part of town where I used to live; it was a little entertaining watching the shift go from “Hi, Zoila” (my community leader) to “Hi, Annalisa.” That was probably one of the few “fun” spots in the two days. While there’s something enjoyable and beautiful about meeting new families and hearing their stories (when they want to share), the stories are, for the most part, quite sad.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Zoila didn’t go easy on me either. The first family we visited was probably the hardest one to hear. It was a young woman who just wanted someone to love her for her, owes thousands of quetzales in debt she accrued getting medical services when her second child was born with a seizure problem (which he no longer has), and is now three months pregnant with her third child by a third man (who is out of the picture because her mother ran him off). Her life has been threatened on multiple occasions as well as those of her children because she can't pay the debt. Her house is just a few sheets of metal nailed to some wooden posts, and she hangs a sheet where a door should be; the rain comes in between her roof and wall in the rainy season. (Fortunately for her, the rainy season decided to end a little early this year.) She believes that her second child was born with the problems he had because she didn’t have proper care while pregnant with him. When we passed through the next day, I brought her pre-natal vitamins and a vitamin-protein powder that is common here.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Many of the families I visited had children who had studied in the past and would like to go back to school but their family doesn’t have the money. One which has me thinking a lot is a family where the woman’s husband left her to go to the United States. He’s there now and no longer calls her or sends her money to help support their children (which, according to the Guatemalans, is the entire reason they go). The woman’s brother has stepped up to take the financial responsibilities of father. He quit his own educational goals to make sure she has everything. However, without an education himself, he weaves to earn money. While weaving can be quite lucrative, it’s very taxing on the body and is becoming less lucrative as machines try to imitate the weaving style of the artisans. I think I want to send him back to school as well. I haven’t done something like that before with someone who is grown, but that doesn’t mean I can’t.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The school year is coming to a close here in Guatemala, and I’ll probably have gone out to Solola again before this article is published. I’m excited to see how the school year went but a little nervous to find out which 6th graders will be pulled out of school because their parents are afraid to trust me and the project. Manuel and I have talked about having a private meeting with all the students who are finishing 6th grade to see if we can keep them in school. I don’t like going behind the parents’ backs, but Manuel is the one who suggested it, and since he knows his community, if he suggested it, I’ll be on board with it.</span></div>
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<br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.6667px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Everyone has a story.</span>Annalisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08247872560777950844noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359486675757920898.post-51136228518441394982016-10-13T09:16:00.000-06:002016-10-13T09:16:07.777-06:00Visiting New Families: Day 2,187Tuesday and Wednesday, I went with Zoila (the community leader in a new village) to meet families for inclusion in the program. You never know who you're going to meet or what they're going to say, and this was no exception.<br />
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Zoila started me off with a real doozy. The woman is a single mother. Her commonlaw husband (with whom she has one daughter) was abusive and a drunkard; so she left him, taking the girl with her. She was determined to find someone who would love her for her. Eventually, she met another fellow, and they started going out. Before long, she decided that he loved her, they had sex (once), and she got pregnant. The man, insisting that you can't get pregnant from having sex once, decided that she had been cheating on him and sleeping around; so he left her. She was depressed and didn't take care of herself during the pregnancy, and when the baby was born, he had a lot of seizure problems. The woman didn't have money to buy medication, and the baby's father didn't accept that the child was his and therefore didn't give any financial support; so she borrowed money to pay for the medication. The boy is now 2 and no longer has seizures, but she still owes the money. And in the midst of being broke and having two children, she did apparently find a fellow who loved her for her and took him as her new commonlaw husband. But the woman's mother decided to run the fellow off...a week before she found out she was pregnant again, and she has no way of contacting him to let him know he's going to be a father. So, single mom of three, thousands of quetzals in debt, who can't get a job because no one will hire a pregnant woman and is receiving death threats for her and her children because she can't pay off what she owes; she's depressed about her current pregnancy and not taking care of herself, doing hard labor in the fields because it's the only job she can get.<br />
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I mean, we could have just stopped my work day right there. Some people have mentally tiring jobs. Some people have physically tiring jobs. I have an emotionally tiring job. We saw 7 other families that day--none quite as difficult as this one--and afterward I came home and slept for 2 hours.<br />
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Since I had to go back the next day, I took her some prenatal vitamins and some Incaparina (a vitamin-protein powder that is common here) before heading out to meet 6 more families. In Educacion con Esperanza, I tend to not gift anything (outside of Christmas every year) because I don't want to create a culture of dependency. However, there is a proper time and place for emergency aid, and I think a broke woman with hardly enough to eat who is depressed and creating a tiny human is an obvious recipient for emergency aid. Once the baby is born, there will be time for other conversation and working to make ends meet, but for now, she just needs to be healthy.<br />
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I was talking to a friend of mine who makes cloth menstrual pads, and she thinks that's an employment which would be good for these women who can't find jobs elsewhere. Sure, they can weave, but that market is pretty flooded around here. I have another friend who grows loofahs, and she has mentioned the idea of loofah farming; however, that would only be a sure plan for the families that own their own land.<br />
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It's all a lot to think about. As I continue digesting all of this, I'll share more stories with you from my visits.Annalisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08247872560777950844noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359486675757920898.post-16493120203767062442016-10-06T16:30:00.001-06:002016-10-06T16:30:05.962-06:00Logos and Funerals: Day 2,180Apparently, my day count was off by A LOT! So, now it is fixed. But the short version is that I complete 6 years here in less than 2 weeks.<br />
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So, after nearly 6 years, I've decided I should probably get important things like business cards which means having a logo which means making a logo which means designing a logo. And since I'm not very good at drawing what I see in my head, I talked to an old high school friend about it. I haven't heard back from her (but she wasn't optimistic that she'd be able to do it from where she's at anyway). Today I saw an ad for someone who is here in Guatemala doing graphic design, and that's probably the more economic way of doing this anyway since living costs are lower here. I sent her a message and she's optimistic about the project...and gave me a quote at the very maximum of what I can pay and still eat this month. I might save half the money this month and then have her do it next month if I can't find anything more in the budget.<br />
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Also after nearly 6 years, I attended my first funeral in Guatemala yesterday. I didn't know the young man (age 23) very well, but I taught his younger sister English for a few years, and she asked me to be there. So, I went. The funeral was 4 hours long, but it felt good to show up and support people going through the completely unexpected event of burying their son. I was really nervous about going because I had never been to a funeral before, but fortunately (perhaps?) the young man who died was good friends with a young man who is associated with our family, and the deceased's family had asked him to be one of the people who carries the coffin; so, I attended the funeral with him and made the entire situation easier on both of us.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjj4rbQp1GicikmuiKQbJKtfbNpjo7oDQndjQ7F31fbYDr82jkJEaW65-TKe5CFULhgB5PPbreSP94yE5O26hMpDp1XoBSxspYdI85yBbpow-wzSlLbmKZ-PlWK0Hp1smonWiIPwHo/s1600/14608831_10100118431279923_6413763428432325186_o.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjj4rbQp1GicikmuiKQbJKtfbNpjo7oDQndjQ7F31fbYDr82jkJEaW65-TKe5CFULhgB5PPbreSP94yE5O26hMpDp1XoBSxspYdI85yBbpow-wzSlLbmKZ-PlWK0Hp1smonWiIPwHo/s320/14608831_10100118431279923_6413763428432325186_o.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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And then this morning my handsomer half called me to inform me that his uncle has passed away. If he can get off work, we'll be attending that funeral as well; so I guess it's a good thing I got some practice going to funerals. </div>
Annalisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08247872560777950844noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359486675757920898.post-346837463514744762016-10-01T10:35:00.000-06:002016-10-01T10:35:07.428-06:00Mission Moment: October<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.3800000000000001; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 36pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I often get people who ask what I do here in Guatemala, and after explaining it to them, they often want to know if I can come to my project in their area. So, a friend of mine who does fundraising for a lot of different projects sat down with me the other day and we crunched some numbers. We learned that it currently only requires $250/month to add another location to the project; this amount may go up in the future if students start going to the university--but there are free universities in Guatemala if you’re good enough to get in--or saving their points to buy more expensive items as the point-money ratio is on a curve.</span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.3800000000000001; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 36pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">This provides school supplies to approximately 25 school children and food staples for 10-12 families, roughly 80 people. Depending on the community leader and his or her level of initiative, this also provides secular and religious workshops for both parents and children. For those of you who aren’t aware of how the program works, the students attend their normal community schools where they are given number grades starting in first grade. Those number grades are then translated into program points which they can use much like money to purchase things from the program. In Guatemala, a student needs to have an average of 60 in each class to pass the school year. Because we know that accidents can happen, we push the kids to have a 70 in each class just in case that last marking period is a bad one. (If they finish the school year with less than a 60 in 1-2 classes, they can take another test covering all of the material in that course from the whole school year. If they have less than 60 in three or more classes, they have to repeat the school year.) However, to earn a point, students have to get at least a 77-79 in a class; that lower range is a little flexible just because some kids just need to feel like they’ve accomplished something. If they earn an 88, they receive 2 point in that class, and if they earn a 97, they get three points. So, they’re actually earning the points which they use to buy the dry goods or shoes or school supplies or whatever else they choose to purchase through the program.</span></div>
<span id="docs-internal-guid-baed65e1-6f12-4ca6-54a5-dfbb95874b74"></span><br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.3800000000000001; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 36pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">That being said, we’re hoping to add not one, but two, new communities next year. Perhaps it’s a little optimistic, but as we’re not currently using </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">all</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> of our monthly funds, we do have some savings to hold us through until we get the ball rolling. Even some Guatemalans have approached me asking how they can donate. We’re planning on re-adding the other community I was working with in Solola the first year and perhaps adding a location in the town where I was living up until recently. It’s all very exciting and I’m so glad that I can share this with you!</span></div>
Annalisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08247872560777950844noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359486675757920898.post-22057690673065765912016-09-12T19:24:00.000-06:002016-09-12T19:24:32.345-06:00New Villages: Day 2,222Our waiting list is currently at <i>five</i>. That's not five families, that's five communities, and there are more who would probably be interested in joining if they were aware we existed...and there are probably more who I would present it to if I knew they existed. So, while I've been adamant about adding no more than one new community per year, I'm thinking about maybe adding two in 2017.<br />
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The main reason why I've been interested in only adding one is quite simple: it takes time and energy to build a relationship with a new community. Trust is not something easily built in this country. Their government says they will change things for the poor, but no change ever comes. Foreigners come and then go back to their country, forgetting all about the people they've met. So, when I say that I am going to do something, they don't believe me. It puts an emotional strain on a person as I struggle to learn names and familial connections in an effort to prove to these people that I am who I say I am. Currently, Educacion con Esperanza serves 11 families with 24 children in school, but because we work for the economy of the entire family, it can be said that we serve 80 people, half of those either in school or pre-school. But let's stop with those numbers for now because I don't want any of them to become just a number.<br />
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However, numbers are the other reason why I've hesitated to add even one more community. This sort of work takes money, and I haven't started a 501c3 (NGO). Why? Well, because I don't know how to. And I read things online and it says to fill out this form or that form and, quite frankly, it all sounds really difficult to do from here and really time-consuming to do from there. But I did some number running the other day. To support the village where I'm working right now, I require $3,000/year. Yes, that's food, school supplies, and bills for 80 people. (That's only $250/month.) Obviously, that can vary based on the enthusiasm of the students for their studies, and the bulk of that is needed in January when the school year starts. However, after doing that math, I felt a lot better about adding one community this coming year...and then I felt a lot better about adding two communities this coming year.<br />
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Do you have $10 you could spare per month? Do you have 24 friends who could spare $10 per month as well? You could adopt a community. You could make life better for about 80 people. You could send about 24 students to school. Be on the lookout later this month for an online campaign to raise the money to send a community to school. Or, if you prefer a paper version, I can get you the address of my sending church and you can mail them a check.Annalisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08247872560777950844noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359486675757920898.post-11681643986996178872016-09-07T13:09:00.000-06:002016-09-07T13:09:05.812-06:00These are a Few of my Least Favorite Things: Day 2,217So, I headed out to Solola on Thursday afternoon. It was to be an overnight trip. I don't do a lot of those just because I like sleeping in my own bed with as many blankets as I want and the bathroom all to myself. I also like having a door on my bedroom so teenagers don't accidentally come barging through the curtain to get their own clothing out of the wardrobe while I'm changing, but maybe that's just me.<br />
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On Thursday, Manuel and I talked about the meeting the following morning with the mayor. Manuel had called him on Monday to set it up. And while I don't prefer mornings as that means we have our normal meeting with the families in the afternoon, I figured that it might be okay just this once as the mayor and I have been trying to get together since February or March; if there was a set meeting with him, I was going to be there. We also went to get many of the food staples we would be distributing the next day, and his kids helped us divide them up into 2- and 3-pound bags.<br />
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So Friday morning arrived. We ate breakfast and headed out early to make sure we were on time for the mayor. We got to the municipal building and...the mayor wouldn't be in. So, between the options of twiddling our thumbs until our meeting with the families at 1 and meeting with the vice mayor, we opted to meet with the vice mayor. Now, since we're not actually affiliated with the government, the vice mayor really had no reason to know who I was or why I was in his office. He sure pretended to know why I was there, but some of the things he said made it obvious that he had no clue what I was about. It was probably the most unproductive meeting I have had in my life...and it's certainly the most unproductive one I've had in recent memory. (At least Manuel had a chance to share about the project with some community leaders seated behind us in the waiting area; that felt productive.) If the mayor still wants to meet with me, he's going to have to come to me...or at least to one of our meetings with the families.<br />
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After that, Manuel apparently had set up another meeting without telling me anything about it; needless to say, I felt a little awkward. There is an "obras sociales" office in Solola that he's apparently connected with. They don't know much of what I do either, but at least they were a little more interested in listening instead of taking over. They only opened their office in March, but they help the poorest of Solola find the help they need. I was quite impressed. They asked if they might use me in case they need to go to the US embassy; I don't know how much help I'd be, but I told them that if I could help, I would.<br />
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Then we went over to the bank to withdraw some money out to buy the beans (and to pay Manuel back for some of the stuff we had bought the day before) before heading back to his house to eat lunch. His wife is a good cook with the ingredients she has. We had time to put the beans in bags before we ate, and we even got the stuff packed in the back seat of the truck. That was good as it started pouring while we ate lunch.<br />
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Fortunately, Santa (the woman whose house we meet at) has a large enough kitchen building that we all fit inside. Little Maria Isabel's grades didn't improve, but the teacher got more creative at marking her report card. Another little boy's grades tanked, and I'm not sure what's going on there; his teacher apparently said that he doesn't understand anything (after two semesters of understanding a lot?). He could still pass. We ran out of sugar and soap. Two families are still in the negative, but one has a child not yet in school (and is guaranteed to get out of the negative next trip) and the other family has a child whose grades weren't out yet and usually earns at least 7 points; so I expect them to be out as well. I offered to let them buy a few things because I don't want anyone going hungry. One family turned me down; the other family bought a few pounds of beans. There's a saying in Guatemala that if more people show up to eat than you had planned on, you just put more water in the beans. I'm curious how long that family can make those few pounds of beans last. <br />
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I don't often let families go into negative points, but I do if I feel that spending the points which put them in the negative is more important than not spending those points. I also have a limit of sorts. It's a rough calculation based on how many points the family normally earns coupled with any guaranteed point earners (kids under school age, special needs kids).<br />
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Chickens (good for both eggs and meat) and fruit trees (avocado, plum, apple, and limon) are in the plans to add to the point catalog for next year, at least in the Solola area, but that's a potential update for sometime later this month.Annalisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08247872560777950844noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359486675757920898.post-3292662219026590502016-09-06T13:06:00.001-06:002016-09-06T13:06:04.534-06:00Language Thoughts: Day 2,216So, I realized that I haven't posted a normal update here in a while. I kind of let my "Mission Moments" cover the bulk of what is going on with the project and little updates over on the <a href="http://www.facebook.com/EducacionConEsperanza/" target="_blank">Facebook page</a> have helped some of you stay up to date as well. (If you are on Facebook and haven't "liked" our page, I invite you to do so! I'll try to do better about keeping the blog up to date, but the Facebook page is just so handy for quick little updates.) I did take a trip out to Solola last week, but I'll write about that in another post.<br />
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This post is about language. I sometimes feel like there are four languages going on around me. First, obviously, Spanish. Second, English. The third and fourth are two similar situations: words that were English and are used in Spanish with little to no change and words that were English and are used in Spanish with Spanish pronunciation.<br />
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Let's start with the first of those two: words that were in English and are used in Spanish with little to no change.<br />
Examples: <i>e-mail, internet, chat.</i> (Are you sensing a theme?) Many of these words are based on technology, and rather than inventing a new word for them--okay, sure "correo electronico," but I don't know anyone who uses that; although they might say "correo" since the postal system here is basically non-existent--they simply adopt the word already in popular usage which happens to be in English. You also see this somewhat in verbs such as <i>textear</i>, but since Spanish verbs have to follow a certain pattern in order to be conjugated (that thing we do in English when it's "I run" but "he run<i>s</i>"), they can't keep there exact English appearance.<br />
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With the second, I can only think of one good example right now, but I know I've heard others. That's <i>chance</i>. Now, remember, these words are English words but they have been taken to fit Spanish pronunciation. That word right there in italics is a two-syllable word: Chan-say. I have no clue how or why this happens.<br />
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Now, in the multi-lingual community, there's something called "code switching." This refers to switching of languages during a conversation. The rules about it are interesting with plenty of theories by linguists who study this stuff. (I suggest the <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Code-switching" target="_blank">Wikipedia article</a> for a thorough overview.) I don't claim to be a studied linguist, but I have noticed a few things. Words which retain their same pronunciation can be code switched. Words which change their pronunciation don't really work with code switching. I'm not positive why that is, but I have some theories. First, it could be because any true bilingual knows that "chance" (since it's the only example I can recall right now) is an English word and should therefore be pronounced as such. Second, it could be because, in Spanish, "chance" doesn't usually use its article ("un," masculine). In English, I would say "Give me a chance!" but Spanish would simply be "Deme chance!" not "Deme un chance!"<br />
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Just some language ramblings. Hope you are all doing well.Annalisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08247872560777950844noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359486675757920898.post-65200699971746576582016-08-01T14:58:00.000-06:002016-08-17T15:06:37.354-06:00Mission Moment: AugustAround December 2014, I went to visit the families in their homes. This is something I do every November/December for families in the program. I see their homes, their living conditions, weigh each child and get updated shoe and clothing sizes; I’ve also started taking height measurements. I remember one visit fairly clearly. It was the family of one of the widows in our program. They knew we were coming, but when we got there, only the two school-aged children were there. Manuel--my community contact and translator--and I chatted with them for a while. When it was obvious their mother wasn’t going to show up, we gave them their Christmas gifts--cookies and a Bible--and prepared to leave. For some reason we asked the boy if he could read, and he said no. I double checked my records; the boy had just finished second grade and couldn’t read the words “Santa Biblia” (“Holy Bible”). We thought it strange and mentally put some blame on the mother for not being involved in her children’s studies. To be fair, the kids would skip out on their way to school and spend the day playing; so we felt blaming her was justified.<br />
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Fast-forward to June 2016, and we’re looking at the report card of a first-grader in that same village.<br />
<a href="https://lh5.googleusercontent.com/iu3LuTPFLdFaox9pUjbXE4Q2xkHLDqNysy89CEft2YIJ3bHTASSayOaaGARGQhSJS0SN1YZ5pN-HKrLQDkYE2PNxfdlqVD_VaDjxV2HHFfUMyaf3_aJEmF4W_NZVEe8lZdqN4K0" imageanchor="1" style="line-height: 22.08px;"><img alt="MITJ grades unit 2.jpg" border="0" height="299" src="https://lh5.googleusercontent.com/iu3LuTPFLdFaox9pUjbXE4Q2xkHLDqNysy89CEft2YIJ3bHTASSayOaaGARGQhSJS0SN1YZ5pN-HKrLQDkYE2PNxfdlqVD_VaDjxV2HHFfUMyaf3_aJEmF4W_NZVEe8lZdqN4K0" style="border: none; transform: rotate(0rad);" width="400" /></a><br />
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During 4 marking periods, students have to have an average of 60 point in each of their classes. (If they have below 60 in up to 2 classes, they can take a make-up exam covering material from the entire year; if they have less than 60 in three or more classes, they automatically fail the year.) So, you can see from the picture why we were concerned about Maria Isabel’s grades. We asked her mother why she got a 46 in every single class this marking period, and she said that she had asked about that. We were instantly happy that this mother had at least been proactive about her daughter’s education. She said that the teacher had “gifted” her daughter these grades because the teacher says that Maria Isabel cannot read or write. First of all, did you all catch where I said this girl was in <i>first grade</i>? Isn’t it part of the teacher’s job to teach these kids to read and write? Maybe it’s slightly different in the US where there’s a higher level of literacy, but since most of the mothers and a few of the fathers in the program are illiterate--and they tend to be a good representation of their communities--it stands to reason that that responsibility would fall 100% on the shoulders of the teacher. Second of all, did you see that last class? It’s Physical Education. Since when does reading and writing have anything to do with how well you can run around cones forward and backward? How can we set these kids up for success when their own teachers aren’t doing their jobs? How do I convince a sixth grader (and his or her parents) to continue studying when the educational system has completely failed them?<br />
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These are the questions I’m struggling with right now. We told the mother to take the report card (or copy of it, rather) and talk to the principal, the advisory board, her community leaders, whoever would listen. If they won’t listen to her (and her husband), then Manuel and I might take it up with the mayor. We never inquired about these weird grades with Luis (the second-grader) because we assumed it was related to him not going to school half the time, but now I feel like we should have.<br />
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In other news, Manuel and I are looking into other possibilities for purchasing food supplies out in the Solola area. I’m also planning on spending about a week and a half with a family out in Solola to study Kaqchikel and coming home for four days and repeating that process until I learn the language. It may deviate a little from that plan when it is put into implementation, but for now that’s what we’re planning.Annalisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08247872560777950844noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359486675757920898.post-69159051740303651792016-05-01T15:12:00.000-06:002016-08-17T15:13:27.264-06:00Mission Moment: MayA couple weeks ago, Handsome had some time to accompany me to Solola. I had been waiting for this because I wanted to take shoes out, and that’s a little difficult on the bus. So, one morning we loaded two large, plastic totes full of shoes as well as three medium-sized duffel bags into his car and headed out. I had planned this trip for February, but with our cat getting sick and eventually dying, we were busy with her. With March ending, I really wanted to do what I said I would do back in February.<br />
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The families were happy to see us. Most of the grades hadn’t come out yet; so many of them had fewer points to spend. However, I know what the shoes mean to a lot of these kids; as one of the mothers told me the first year, “My son realized that he could earn things with good grades when I brought home the shoes.” As a result, I allowed some of the families to go into “debt” with their points. I’m hoping it turns out to be an investment that results in better grades.<br />
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In mid-April, I’m hosting a retreat in my house for missionary women who live in this area. At time time that I’m writing this, it hasn’t happened yet; so I can’t tell you about how it went. However, it’s put on by a website called Velvet Ashes, a site which ministers to women serving overseas. This is the first time I’ve participated (and only the second time they’ve offered it online), but I decided to jump in with both feet and host a group. I’m looking forward to getting to know some of the other missionary women in this area and learn about the work they’ve been called to do.<br />
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<b>Language Learning</b></div>
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Your word in Kaqchikel for this month is “xajab” (sha-HAB). (I don’t think I’ve given you that one before.) It means “shoe” in English. In Spanish, it’s “zapato.” When I ask the kids (or their parents) what size shoe they wear, I say, “Ach kin numer xajab?” (Besides the last word, that’s all phonetically for those of you who are trying to learn Kaqchikel or for those of you who read the newsletter to someone else.)<br />
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I have one delightful woman in the program who <i>only</i> speaks to me in Kaqchikel. Sure, she doesn’t know much Spanish, but she won’t even say “hello” (“hola”) or “goodbye” (“adios”) to me in Spanish. I find it funny because this woman who has never even gone to school is utilizing one of the best ways to teach a language with me. If all the rest of my parents would follow suit, I’d probably be fluent in Kaqchikel in no time.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><img alt="12911007_1005410089541812_377346171_n.jpg" height="214" src="https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/U_xvRI44-g8dXeNef2HX5QHO9ysYU45Afqw5mJX9B34waPlLdbStVJPMeGihkjqEaaQE5gSqzbTD6S6IZma8BCSwc7_QWqvjAZwqzs-1VlpemsNzEU4_zLKdw2IcUNwF6td60II" style="border: none; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; transform: rotate(0rad);" width="283" /></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Some of the mothers looking for the perfect pair</td></tr>
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<span id="docs-internal-guid-fa2cff8c-9a58-b680-be7e-892771826475"><span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.6667px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></span>Annalisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08247872560777950844noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359486675757920898.post-41634593795313071142016-04-01T17:59:00.000-06:002016-04-01T17:59:21.145-06:00Shoe Crazy: Day 2,089Yesterday, Handsome and I went out to meet the families. Most of them don't yet have their first-semester grades--they'll probably come out next week--but it's been about 2 months since I was out there. I had planned to go in February, but one of our cats became ill--we think it was a spinal tumor--and was eventually put down. So, Handsome's days off became "deal with cat" days instead of "drive shoes to Solola" days.<br />
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Anyway, the families were happy to see me and happy to see the shoes. There is a rule of "one pair of shoes per person in the family," but I just kept recalling the story of <a href="http://gringaontheground.blogspot.com/2014/09/into-final-stretch-day-1538.html" target="_blank">the boy who realized that hard work does have rewards</a>, and I didn't deny them a pair of tennis shoes and a pair of dress shoes. I took my entire shoe stock out to Solola, and Handsome figures we brought back only 25% of it. The rule mostly exists so that families don't just buy a lot of shoes and then go and sell them elsewhere for actual money. Additionally, it takes a long time (and a fair amount of money) to get that many shoes bought and down to Guatemala, and my mother (predominantly) spends a LOT of time trying to get the sizes and styles which are most needed.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFVym3pfjbCAheEz01E2SfFBCR5HIy3dGQIQSuTZoh8Qk0qNPAuR1vWrv0cT1R9jgHbA0GKBrqV5zqAvsijT182RSuHrHL06am03W_4YCwAxY9SnBHMLDeknLxrLL31G1Hx3jfkMA/s1600/12910999_1005410122875142_1235335975_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFVym3pfjbCAheEz01E2SfFBCR5HIy3dGQIQSuTZoh8Qk0qNPAuR1vWrv0cT1R9jgHbA0GKBrqV5zqAvsijT182RSuHrHL06am03W_4YCwAxY9SnBHMLDeknLxrLL31G1Hx3jfkMA/s320/12910999_1005410122875142_1235335975_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Some of the women look through the last remaining shoes in the box</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjaX4fivUZRb4x9qwIhVCSp45oN8BgBqHQNwZcoWsUNAwV5mtj5pZAiBz4fKELHN5qC0dihZ9u6YuujeVGniLorbwDWPlIdf7ftu8mKXCpyi4bpL-wfnz15KQ0_V6gB7mtfgvmVNwQ/s1600/12921032_1005410072875147_1459734646_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjaX4fivUZRb4x9qwIhVCSp45oN8BgBqHQNwZcoWsUNAwV5mtj5pZAiBz4fKELHN5qC0dihZ9u6YuujeVGniLorbwDWPlIdf7ftu8mKXCpyi4bpL-wfnz15KQ0_V6gB7mtfgvmVNwQ/s320/12921032_1005410072875147_1459734646_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Their purchases will be noted in Annalisa's binder</td></tr>
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The crates were donated by one of our good friends at<a href="http://www.childrenoftheamericas.org/" target="_blank"> COTA</a> and are very helpful for storing project materials. Thank you!Annalisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08247872560777950844noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359486675757920898.post-35153337590749312882016-01-26T07:51:00.002-06:002016-01-26T07:51:57.069-06:00A Kiss: Day 2,023Perhaps one of the most touching moments of yesterday was as the families were leaving. One of the new boys in the program took my hand and kissed the back of it. This is a sign of deep respect reserved for the elders of the community. In fact, I don't think I've ever seen anyone under the age of 65 be the recipient. I must admit that I typically foster affection with my families which, while not contrary to respect in any way, typically fosters hugs, not hand kissing. I was very touched that the child thought to do that and quite surprised! (I'm only 30!)Annalisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08247872560777950844noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359486675757920898.post-39071281236236642602016-01-25T17:29:00.002-06:002016-01-25T17:29:50.203-06:00Saying Hello to 2016: Day 2,022Yesterday, I headed out to Solola once again. I had bought school supplies on Saturday and sent them with someone trustworthy going that way. This time I took my friend Genesis with me; she blogs over at <a href="http://expatmom.info/" target="_blank">Expat Mom</a> if you want to read her stories of life overseas.<br />
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Sunday afternoon was interesting as we went to visit three families for possible inclusion in the program <i>this year</i>. The first family we visited was a lot further of a walk than we expected, but it wasn't any harder than I had experienced. The woman's story is that she was living with a man--<a href="http://gringaontheground.blogspot.com/2015/06/marriage-and-culture-day-1813.html" target="_blank">marriage isn't common</a> out in the areas where I work--and he decided to leave her and their daughter and go illegally to the United States to find work. He managed to do that...and also find an American woman to marry legally. He came back to present his new wife to his family before leaving again, and the woman called him out on it saying that he had, at the very least, a daughter to support. <i>That</i> daughter is now grown and married. <br />
However, about 7 years ago, the woman took up with another fellow and had three children with him. According to her, he only recognizes the first two children as his own--meaning his name is on their birth certificate--while the baby, who is a year old tomorrow, has no listed father. This should, in theory, mean that the fellow vanished about a year ago. The second man was already married, maybe even legally, and decided to go back to his first wife. The woman says she receives no support from him.<br />
And <i>if</i> all of that were true, then the big screen TV and the sound system wouldn't be such a problem to have found in the house. However, what we did find were men's shoes and men's clothing, not in a big bag as though she were a clothing vendor, but scattered around in a bedroom and the living room. Manuel is looking into the situation, but until it can be confirmed by outsiders that the man is gone, has been gone for a while, and is not supporting the family (and that that big-screen plasma TV isn't hooked up to Q150/month or more cable), we cannot take this family into consideration in good conscience.<br />
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The second and third families we went to visit were families which we had visited <a href="http://gringaontheground.blogspot.com/2014/09/into-final-stretch-day-1538.html" target="_blank">a while back</a>. However, with one family <a href="http://gringaontheground.blogspot.com/2015/10/back-to-meetings-day-1936.html" target="_blank">leaving the area</a> and another family <a href="http://gringaontheground.blogspot.com/2016/01/disappointment-and-god-reasons-day-2004.html" target="_blank">choosing to not send any children to school this year</a>, we had two empty places and I had these two families on my heart. Mostly our visit was to confirm that they still wanted to be a part of the program, update the information I had on the family, take a new picture of the family (which I lost when my hard drive died last January), and see if they had already bought their school supplies. <br />
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We added their school supply lists in with what we still needed to buy (things which had been out of stock when I bought supplies in Antigua the day before), and we headed to Manuel's house for the night where we ate dinner and then divided up the school supplies among the families. I was reading off the lists while the kids put the different things in the bag. They all have good educations and are going to good schools; so I decided to start doing the numbers in English. Then I started doing some of the items in English (glue, scissors, pen, etc); however, one kept tripping them up. I would say "pencil" and they would hold up a <i>pincel</i>, a paint brush. We got to bed sometime around 11 pm.<br />
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Today we had to buy school supplies for the new families and the supplies I didn't get in Antigua, give out supplies, and meet with the mayor. I met Andres Iboy (the mayor of Solola) a few years ago during his first term in office. I had started the program in another part of his municipality; he had heard about it and wanted to know if it could be offered elsewhere. So, he's always interested in hearing about the project, and in the time I have known him, he has never claimed that Educacion con Esperanza was ever his doing (unlike other politicians I have heard of concerning other organizations). However, I told Manuel that it would be better to have that meeting after our meeting with the families; we had too much to do beforehand. So, we went and bought school supplies and headed out to the meeting location.<br />
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All of the families were there and waiting for us. They were all happy to see us. They were all happy with their school supplies. And I got a sunburn. Manuel told them that if the first marking period grades were not adequate that he would start going around to the schools and talking to the teachers. One mother--whose kids tend to have good grades--wasn't pleased with that; she thinks that if other people start realizing that some families are getting help that all the families will demand to receive help as well. To some extent, I see her point, but at the same time, why do the neighbors think a white lady visits her family every year?<br />
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Near the end of the meeting, Manuel asked me if we were going to stay for lunch. I asked about the meeting with the mayor; so he called about that. The mayor wasn't available today, only the vice-mayor. Since that fellow probably has no clue who I am and probably wouldn't be able to have the conversations we need to have, I said that Genesis and I would head home instead; we both have responsibilities here. Besides, I already had plans to stop at my very favorite eatery in Chimaltenango for lunch. So, at the end of the meeting, Manuel dropped us off in Los Encuentros, and we headed for home.Annalisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08247872560777950844noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359486675757920898.post-57777436441876544972016-01-07T12:40:00.000-06:002016-01-07T12:40:24.259-06:00Disappointment and God Reasons: Day 2,004You might remember that about 2.5 years ago I dealt with a<a href="http://gringaontheground.blogspot.com/2013/08/a-disappointing-situation-day-1041.html" target="_blank"> little disappointment </a>concerning moving out to Solola where I thought I'd be more useful; I cannot find that I ever explicitly told you about this, but God had a reason for me to not move, and that was to watch two neighbor boys while their sisters were in school and mother was at work. (Their grandmother had been watching them, but her son--who lived in another town--got sick; so she went to care for him.)<br />
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Right now I feel like I'm going through something similar. A friend had thought about putting a bakery in one room of our house which was going to help out a lot with the rent; while I was in the States visiting family, she decided not to and didn't tell me. So, I came back to that. (She had posted on Facebook, but I hadn't seen it. Still not a great way to find out.) <br />
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So, we talked about what to do with that room, and I had pretty much decided that I would use it as my office.<br />
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Today I found out that neither young lady will be coming to study in Antigua next year. (One isn't going to study at all while the other will only be studying on the weekends in Solola.) In short, we prepared our house to have two rooms not being used by us in addition to having a guest room...and then neither of those two rooms' intended purposes happened.<br />
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However, a friend called looking for a place to stay for a while and occupied my guest room a couple days ago. And so I need another guest room. But I have the room that was prepped for the girls. (Okay, I don't *need* a guest room, but they're useful.) In short, God knew I would need the space for my friend. It doesn't really make it less disappointing that Mercedes and Wendy won't continue studying, but at least we didn't prepare the house for nothing. And, trying to look on the bright side, as I don't have my residency yet, leaving the country in May was going to be difficult while juggling my responsibilities with them.Annalisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08247872560777950844noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359486675757920898.post-71717660593111656672015-12-19T17:01:00.001-06:002015-12-19T17:01:40.833-06:00Saying "Goodbye" to 2015: Day 1,985I am always struck by the generosity of people who have so little. As I spent yesterday and today visiting my families in their homes, I--and the three people with me: Manuel, his son, and his son's friend--was greeted with anything from a snack to a meal in just about every home. (At one home today, I finally just had to eat a single tortilla, thank them for their generosity, and tell them I was completely stuffed and couldn't eat anything more.)<br />
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We didn't have an end-of-year meeting like we had last year. Between some personal issues and going to visit my folks, I had over a month that was taken up by non-program stuff. Which is fine. We simply asked the questions at the home visits which I do every December.<br />
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This time we started our visit with David's family. David just turned four; so he won't be going to school this year, but he's always happy to see me. His oldest sister is Wendy, one of the two I was hoping to have come live with me next year to continue her studies as there is no high school in their village. Due to their mother's poor health--which is, thankfully, improving--the family has decided that Wendy will take a year off from studying on a regular basis. She will still be taking technology classes on the weekends when her younger sister is home from school. We all hope that their mother is feeling better next year so Wendy can continue her studies.<br />
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Then we went to visit Jesus's family. (I know that sounds funny from an American standpoint, but it's actually a really common Spanish name.) He's the father of the family, and their family holds a special place in my memory because when I first met the family, they had just had a litter of kittens, and while I was doing the intake paperwork, one kitten just jumped right up on my leg and made itself comfortable there. Anyway, he has three children in school. The eldest, Olga, just finished 6th grade. I asked her parents if she was going to keep studying, and they said "no." So, I asked why, and it's mostly a money issue. When it was explained that the program helps with the costs, the "no" became a "maybe." We'll see what happens there.<br />
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After that, we went to visit the family of Luis and Mercedes, the other young lady I was hoping would come live with me to continue her studies. Luis failed his technology class and his Spanish class and didn't pass the make-up test for those classes; so he failed 7th grade. He has decided to not repeat the grade and will be heading back to work in the fields. For me, this puts a lot of pressure on Mercedes as someone has to care for their little sister Clara (a special needs child) once their parents are gone. She is a little nervous about studying so far from her family; she feels she will miss them. She has not given me an answer one way or another, but if she does not continue her studies <i>somewhere</i>, her family will forfeit their place in the program; they have no potential students left. (If Mercedes were to take a year off and then decide to continue her studies, I would certainly give them a spot; however, she will be 18 in March. In this culture, that is quite old to be a single female...even if the laws have recently changed.)<br />
<br />
Then we went to visit Veronica's family. Veronica is the girl who failed 2nd grade this year after being sent to live with her paternal grandmother's family. Her mom tells me she is living at home again and only goes to sleep at her grandmother's house and that she will repeat 2nd grade. Her younger brother, Adolfo, will be in 3rd grade and another brother in 1st.<br />
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Then we went to visit a family who has always weighed heavily on my heart. You might remember Ismael who, as a 14-year old in 3rd grade, decided to drop out of school because he was embarrassed to be with classmates so much younger. I can't say I completely blame him. However, his 12-year old sister just finished 2nd grade this year and has gone to work in the capitol saying she's no longer interested in studying. Now, those of you in the States and in many other countries with advanced educational systems probably find the second part of what I just said more disturbing than the first part; I assure you that anyone who lives and works in this country is more disturbed by the first part. At any rate, we're all disturbed together. Their 10-year old sister just failed 1st grade for the second time. I suggested maybe they <i>should</i> have her work for a year and let her decide if brain work or manual work is more her style. Yes, I'm frustrated. Anyway, Manuel had a talk with the dad and said that as the father of the family, he needed to lay down the rules about who makes decisions in the family about work and study. So, both the girls are going back to school in 2016.<br />
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Then we went to visit the family of Ronaldo. He will be in 9th grade this year, and that's exciting for me, but it's also a little sad. Because he is missing a hand, he was allowed to continue studying while his other 4 brothers had to go to work in the field after 6th grade. This year, his youngest brother will be in 5th grade, and, quite frankly, I'm dreading the family visits the year after next. Ronaldo really isn't that great of a student unlike his other two brothers who I've had the pleasure of knowing, but his family doesn't think he can do field work. What his family sees as a weakness is the only thing that has kept him in school, but I think that knowing that his family feels he is less than whole is also what holds him back. If Maynor--the youngest boy--is taken out of school at the end of 2017, I don't know who will be more crushed: Ronaldo or myself. It feels like someone has said that Ronaldo's judgement day is coming in exactly 2 years, and I'm helpless to stop it. I asked the mother if, after working in the fields last year, Efraim would be returning to school, and she said no. Carmelina, their oldest sister, isn't doing too well either; however, they had lost the contact number for the organization that was helping with her seizure medication. Fortunately, I still had it in my phone and was able to give it to them; so, hopefully that gets fixed soon. (That was also the organization that fitted Ronaldo with his prosthetic hand; so maybe that means he can get a new one without having to go all the way to Salama in January.)<br />
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Then we went to visit their cousins. The story is much like the story we heard about Olga in Jesus's house: Marta Lidia--who earned the most points of any child in the program in 2014--has finished 6th grade, and they're not sure whether to send her to middle school because of the cost. Also, apparently, Marta is afraid of not being able to finish and making me angry...at which point I yelled--she was outside--"No, <i>this</i> is what's making me angry!" Of course, it was a joke because I'm not one to get angry. But if someone is sincerely trying and falls short, I'm completely okay with it. So, they're going to see if they can get her to go.<br />
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After that, we stopped in with our other widow, Maria. It was a pleasant surprise to meet her eldest daughter, Feliciana. She was a little shy and didn't want to explain who she was or what she was doing there at first, but after some cajoling--which I tend to think I'm pretty good at--she warmed up to our presence. She has a wonderful control of Spanish, but then again, her mother's Spanish isn't that bad. Luis and Griselda had dropped out of school about 3 months in. I can't say that surprised me much, but it was annoying. Some days I want to blame them. Some days I want to blame their mother. Some days I just want to flop down on the ground and throw a temper tantrum. If anyone has any better ideas, I'm all for hearing them. Their youngest sister, Amalia, will also be starting school this year.<br />
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Today we went to visit Nicolas's family. We were concerned he was going to pull his family out of the program. To be fair, last year was not a good year for them as far as the points were concerned. They weren't earning enough during the entire year to even pay for their school supplies. However, the elder daughter has improved her grades significantly, and the middle daughter's grades have stayed about the same. It was really great to walk up to their house in the drizzle and see that they had constructed a new building with two rooms in it. When asked if they had received help to build it, Nicolas told us that he had been saving for many years and that with the help from the program to buy food, he'd been able to save a little bit more money and built it during the year.<br />
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And then onto the house of Luisa. You may remember that she got lost in the first year, but then last December I asked Manuel if we could go to her house just to "make sure" that she wasn't interested in the program. They <i>were</i> interested, but they weren't sure how to get a hold of us. So, this was their first year actually participating in the program. The boys were thrilled with their Christmas present. This year each family got a bag of marbles, some hygiene items, mini candy canes, a pen or two, and some hair ties. After giving out 8 presents yesterday, I asked Manuel's son if marbles were popular here, and he assured me that they are. Edgar and Cristian definitely confirmed that. "BOLICHES! MAMA, MIRA! BOLICHES!!" (They're called "cincos" where I live, but also during last night's conversation, I was informed of other potential names for them.)<br />
Luisa confirmed that her neighbors who were also in the program have moved the entire family to the capitol, and then she mentioned another neighbor, a single woman who unknowingly got involved with a married guy, had three kids by him, and then had him go back to his "real" family. So, we might go visit her at some point during the year and consider her for inclusion in the program.Annalisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08247872560777950844noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359486675757920898.post-90656845691467262362015-11-02T09:52:00.000-06:002015-11-02T09:52:25.870-06:00Myers Briggs and Jung: Day 1,938I take a <a href="http://www.celebritytypes.com/test.php" target="_blank">M-B style test</a> roughly every year or two. I find it fascinating to see how a person's personality changes with time. When I came to Guatemala just over 5 years ago, I was very much an INFP; I had ranked as that since middle school. After being at the Hogar and being a teacher, I became an INTJ. For a long time after that, I kept scoring as an INTJ which for someone like me is frustrating because while I think that thinking is a good thing, I also think that feeling is equally important. And while I like to have matters "settled" (a J characteristic), I'm always open for changes in plans (a P characteristic). For example: I go into a meeting with a list of what we're going to talk about, but if I see that there is something more important to talk about, sure, let's talk about it! While I make plans--just to not be fumbling around at the last minute and wasting others' time--they are 100% flexible to adjust to the needs of the group.<br />
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So, I have accepted that I am an intuitive (N) introvert (I), but beyond that, I'm a little more fluid. On the T-F scale, while at the Hogar and teaching, there was little space for "Oh, well, this person is trying hard; so they can have a better grade." No, there had to be a separate category for that on the grading rubric, usually called "participation." Everyone had to be treated equally so that I wouldn't be accused of playing favorites or anything like that. In my project, there's a little more flexibility, and I think Jeanne stated it best on Thursday that there's a point when you have to bend the rules simply to encourage. A grade of 79 is my "hard limit" for earning the first point, but when a child's report card has a 78 or even a 77 as the highest grade, I'm no longer in a position where I have to say "No, tough luck." My goal is encouraging kids to get better grades now, not grading them. Yes, you may have a point.<br />
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So, I'm pleased to announce that today I tested as an INFJ. The I, N, and F were all 82% strength while the J was only 64% reflecting my flexibility.<br />
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INFJ</div>
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Sensitive, empathic, and insightful, you care deeply about people, wanting to accommodate them on the one hand, and having strong visions that you desperately want to turn into reality on the other. Often preoccupied with mulling over your personal thoughts in your own head, others are likely to describe you as tolerant, courteous, and appreciative, but also a bit remote and dreamy. Thoughtful and caring, you have a well-developed facility for putting yourself in another person's place and an instinctive understanding of how people work. Though you tend to spend considerable time fantasizing about how society could be improved, you typically refrain from arguing passionately in favor of your solutions. Instead, you prefer to influence others by gently letting them know how their individual contributions would be invaluable in the greater scheme of things.</div>
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(From my results today.)<br />
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Some famous INFJs from history for you: Adolf Hitler, Osama bin Laden, Mahatma Ghandi, Thomas Jefferson, and Ron Paul. Interesting mix which just goes to show that one's personality doesn't dictate what side of history one will be on.<br />
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If you'd like to learn more about the general concept, Wikipedia is a good start: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Myers%E2%80%93Briggs_Type_Indicator<br />
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<br />Annalisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08247872560777950844noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359486675757920898.post-6316716618123364622015-11-01T20:05:00.000-06:002015-11-01T20:05:00.237-06:00What's next?: Day 1,937This is more about the meeting on Thursday. I had the chance to talk to Mercedes and Wendy's mothers (as well as Mercedes's brother as their mother's Spanish isn't very good). I presented to them the option of the two teens coming to live with me next year. It's <a href="http://gringaontheground.blogspot.com/2015/01/mission-moment-january.html" target="_blank">common knowledge</a> that the two young ladies want to continue their studies; however, to do so where they currently live is not highly practical nor financially sound...which is why they received the invites.<div>
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To be clear, I would not be inviting them to come live with me if they hadn't shown over the past two years that they are mature, responsible, and respectful. I would not be inviting them to come live with me if they hadn't shown that they actually care about studying and believe in the importance of an education. I wouldn't be inviting them to live with me if their families had not proven to be trustworthy. Because, in the end, I will be the one responsible for them and anything that happens while they are in my care can be made to be my fault. (Mercedes will be 17 next year, and Wendy will be 16.)</div>
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Do I think they will accept the invitations? I think Wendy's family will. In the past few months, her mother has been very sick/weak from what I understand. The family is Q10,000 in debt and the father has been unable to work as he has taken over all of the housework. (I'm not sure why Wendy can't do it in the morning and Floricelda in the afternoon, but I won't complain since they're both pulling good grades.) Wendy's uncle was taken in by a relative when he was a boy, a relative who didn't live in the Solola area, and he later returned much more educated and able to earn well. Having Wendy come to live with me would just be a different kind of "<a href="http://gringaontheground.blogspot.com/2015/10/back-to-meetings-day-1936.html" target="_blank">relative taking in a family member to help with finances</a>" sort of move.</div>
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Will Mercedes's family? I don't know, and that frustrates me because, while I believe that everyone should be able to have a quality education if they want it, I think she's the one who really needs it. She has a special needs little sister, and someday, when her mother dies, she'll probably be the one who has to care for her little sister. That means she either needs to earn well or marry well...both of which are more possible when one has a better education. At the same time, though, the family depends on her to help out in the home <i>now</i>. Could they do it? Could they make it work? I think so. But I think it will take a lot more convincing than Wendy's family. Please be praying.</div>
Annalisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08247872560777950844noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359486675757920898.post-19706333948097308192015-10-31T20:02:00.002-06:002015-10-31T20:02:29.284-06:00Back to Meetings!: Day 1,936I was finally able to get out to see my families two days ago. <span style="font-size: x-small;">(I would have written sooner, but my <a href="http://gringaontheground.blogspot.com/2013/02/im-sorry-youre-not-allowed-in-our.html" target="_blank">stalker</a> has been on the move again; so I'm trying to keep him a fair number of steps behind me. He recently took to social media which means I'm struggling to keep you all informed of the situation while worrying about what he is and is not seeing.)</span> One of my friends from COTA was able to join me, and she was able to identify some people that the team can possibly help in January. Unfortunately, the COTA team won't be that close to where these people live, but transportation is available.<br />
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I haven't been out since mid-May for various <a href="http://gringaontheground.blogspot.com/2015/08/putting-things-on-pause-day-1870.html" target="_blank">reason</a>s; so I had some apologizing to do, and Manuel had some apologizing to do. But all in all, they were glad I was back...even if some of them admitted to me that they thought I had vanished. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry! <br />
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We have also lost one family. I didn't mention this to you before as I was hoping to cool down and mention it calmly, but since they left the program, it has helped me calm considerably. This family's oldest son finished 6th grade last year. His grades weren't horrible, but he wasn't earning much in the way of points, hardly enough to buy his school supplies and certainly not enough to pay private school bills. I <a href="http://gringaontheground.blogspot.com/2015/01/mission-moment-january.html" target="_blank">visited</a> each family in December talking to them about the upcoming school year and getting updated clothing sizes and weights for each child, but when I visited this family, they mentioned nothing about planning to send their oldest son to one of the most prestigious boarding schools in the capitol...which is funny since you have to enroll there in November. So, this frustrated me because I figured they had done it because of the program, and I decided I was going to force them to play by the rules...every single bill was going to cost them 5 points and the boy wasn't going to earn enough himself and they were going to use the points from every single one of their children to keep that one child in school which meant no food stuffs or anything for the family. And if they had talked to me about it in December, I would have suggested it was a bad idea, but they didn't. They simply turned in his long and expensive school supply list in January, and we were confused as to why we had a list with no name on it for a school in the capitol. They came to our <a href="http://gringaontheground.blogspot.com/2015/03/the-first-saturday-session-day-1721.html" target="_blank">first Saturday Session</a>, and then they stopped coming. Manuel says he called their number and there's no answer. Neighbors say that the entire family moved to the capitol. I'm really not going to cry over it.<br />
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Last year, our highest point earner was Marta with 57 points. She had a big lead on her cousin Efraim (37 points) who didn't return to school this year and Wendy (36 points). However, this year there are a lot of other kids who are giving her a run for her, er, points. Sadly, part of it is because Marta isn't earning the grades she earned last year. After 3 of 4 marking periods, 22 points! Yikes! Her brother, Rolando, has 23 points after 3 marking periods. A girl from a family that was going to drop out also has 22 points after 3 marking periods. (That was encouraging; last year she only earned 9 points all year.) Wendy is at 40 points after 3 marking periods and may win the "award" for the most points. (There's so far no physical award, but I'm open to suggestions.) I only have two marking periods of grades for Nelson, but he has 22 points; this is really good as he had a rough year last year only earning 5 points in total! Mercedes, my other 9th grader, has 26 points after 3 marking periods; we're worried about her math grade, but otherwise she's doing well in classes.<br />
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Those are the good stories, especially for Yoselin and Nelson. However, there are stories that aren't so good, and more unfortunately they have to do with the two widows in the program. Maria Elena's husband died when she was about 8 months pregnant with their son. She has 7 children ranging in age from 3 to 22. The oldest three, all females, also work to help support the family, but at 15 and 22 it won't be long before the oldest two marry and have families of their own to care for. Luis, 11, and in second grade and Griselda, K, struggled all of last year. Griselda didn't want to go to school and was frequently absent. Luis went but was not that interested in his studies. On Thursday their mother told me that they both dropped out of school, but that she plans for them to go back next year. I'm hoping things go better next year, but I worry about Luis as next year he'll be 12 and in the second grade; last year we had a 14-year old in 4th grade and he dropped out because he was so much older than his classmates.<br />
The other widow, Marta, has four children who range in age from 4 to 10. Her mother-in-law suggested that Marta send her the eldest (Veronica, the only girl) so that Marta would have fewer mouths to feed. Families are much more connected in Guatemala, and a relative offering to feed and care for another relative is nothing unusual. And really this should eliminate Veronica from the program as it serves households; so leaving the household would make her no longer a recipient. But that's completely irrelevant. In her paternal grandmother's home, it appears there is another girl around her age who does nothing but watch TV all day. (This is, of course, second-hand information. Third-hand if you count the fact that it was translated for me.) Education is not important in that household. Veronica's grades went from passing (60+) to failing. Her report card was full of everything from 24 to 38. It wasn't even something I looked at and thought "She must have forgotten to turn in an assignment." I just wanted to cry. The only way she can possibly pass the school year is to get 100 in every class this final marking period. Marta wanted to earn a stove this year. Instead she won't have the points for school supplies for all of her children next year. She has one child who isn't yet old enough to go to school; so I can loan her the points, knowing that they will get repaid by her youngest, but it's just so hard to know what to do in a situation like this. I feel like screaming "TV is the devil and it will rot your brain! Save your daughter before it's too late!" but really the issue isn't the TV; the issue is the importance of education not being stressed in her new home. I'd love for Veronica to be back with her mother.<br />
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There is more to say, but I think I will save it for another post. This one is long enough. (Also, October 19th was my 5-year anniversary here in Guatemala. Half a decade! Yikes!)Annalisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08247872560777950844noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359486675757920898.post-40459099813118358992015-10-01T13:30:00.000-06:002015-10-01T13:30:00.202-06:00Mission Moment: September<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>These are the articles I write for my sending church's newsletter. This one, in place of being titled "Mission Moment" was titled "Political Panorama." Guatemala has been undergoing a lot of changes in the last few months which has caused a slow season for my project.</i><br /><br /><br />Frustrating. That’s a
word I don’t use a lot, but that’s the word I’m using to describe right
now. This article will have nothing to
do with actual mission work and a lot to do with why things sometimes don’t
work.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
In February of this year, it was discovered that money was
being stolen from the country of Guatemala via a customs scam. When goods are imported to the country, the
importer has to pay taxes. The customs
scam was allowing importers to pay much lower taxes for their goods with a nice
“donation” to someone else. In April, it
was discovered that that “someone” was probably a couple high-ranking
government officials, specifically the president and vice president of
Guatemala. And so began the
protests. Since April, people have been
protesting at least once per week all over the country. In May, the vice president resigned saying
that she had nothing to hide and that by resigning she was allowing herself to
be investigated. The Guatemalan people
called her bluff, and she went on the run.
The president said that despite the pressure of “a few” people, he had
been charged with the post of president by the Guatemalan people and that he
would not let them down by giving up.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Jump forward to August 21<sup>st</sup>. Protests have become daily but remain peaceful
simply blocking vehicle and pedestrian traffic.
In a moment of bad luck, the former vice president checks into a
hospital, and she leaves in handcuffs.
Protests become constant with travel becoming essentially
impossible. The president sticks with his
resolve that he has a job to do and will complete his promise to the Guatemalan
people. Then congress votes to remove
the president’s political immunity meaning he can now be investigated as part
of the custom’s scheme which has robbed the Guatemalan government of hundreds
of thousands of dollars which affected the salaries and resources of hospitals,
schools, and police among others. The
president resigns the next day, apologizing to the Guatemalan people, saying
that he has some personal situations he needs to take care of. The new vice president steps up to become
president, and as he was one of the judges who overturned the ruling concerning
General Rios Montt of the genocide cases during the Guatemalan civil war, no
one is really sure if he’s just going to complete the last 4 months of the term
he has been granted or if he’s just going to overthrow everything and turn the
country back into a military dictatorship.
Indigenous people are not impressed.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
One week later, normal elections are held to pick the new
president of the country. (Don’t be
confused. This has nothing to do with
anyone resigning. Just like the US,
presidential elections take place every 4 years.) A man who no one expected to win 4 months ago
becomes the front-runner…probably solely because he’s not a politician and has
no history of corruption anywhere in his family. The fellow who everyone expected to win is in
third place but demanding a recount of ballots.
If no candidate wins 50.1% of the votes, a run-off between the top two
candidates follows in late October.
(Guatemala has somewhere around 18 political parties; not all of which
necessarily had a presidential candidate running this year.) But Mister Third Place was not the only one
upset. In many places, the vote was close,
and in the weeks following, those who were not happy with the outcome had
less-than-peaceful protests. Ballot
boxes were burned. Police were shot. And the mayor’s house in Solola might be
torched for the third time in ten years and my community contact, Manuel, isn’t
answering his phone…which is why I’m not traveling out to Solola to visit my
families. I don’t consider myself to be
at any risk; however, the people in Solola are swift to carry out justice (i.e.
lynching) against anyone they feel has wronged them…and Manuel is an advisor to
the mayor. So, until I can get a hold of
him and until things have calmed down, I have no plans of going anywhere.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>Please note: In most places, things are calm and orderly at this point. Mister Third Place has dropped out. However, many higher-ups are still being arrested as the story opens wider and wider. Please be praying for Guatemala, but in no way, shape, or form should you think that I am in any danger. </i> </div>
Annalisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08247872560777950844noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359486675757920898.post-18818397016668231172015-09-17T15:52:00.000-06:002015-09-17T15:52:00.224-06:00Fluency: Day 1,892Things are still on hold as we wait to see what is happening with elections and the new government; however, that hasn't put my brain on hold. As I rode back home with my handsomer half yesterday, I reflected on language fluency and what it means to be fluent. And it's something I think about more as I start to incorporate a third language into my brain. A long time ago, I studied German, and it was probably my #2 language. I won't pretend that I was ever as good at it as I am with Spanish today, but it was enough there that I don't anticipate a hardship at putting it back in my brain. However, both times I have learned it, I have learned it as an English speaker.<br />
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I've come to the conclusion that being bi- (or tri- or quad- or whatever-)lingual is not about constructing language but rather about breaking it down. There are things I can say in English that I cannot say in Spanish, but there are also things I can say in Spanish that I can't really say in English just because the sentiment doesn't exist or because it is complicated and contorted.<br />
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So, when I consider German and the small amount of German which I do know now, I struggle because my German is tied to my English, not my Spanish. My handsomer half has two nieces, and the younger one now calls him <i>Tio Ente</i>. "Ente" in German is "Duck" in English. And when it made me giggle, and he asked me why, I told him, "<i>Ente</i> es aleman para <i>duck</i>, er, pato." (My handsomer half speaks only Spanish; although he is trying to learn English.) And I realized that learning German as an English speaker is <i>not</i> helping me to break down the language. If I can't go from German to Spanish without English in the middle, can I really claim to be fluent in Spanish?<br />
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<a href="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/a/a1/Mallard2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="243" src="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/a/a1/Mallard2.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<i>What is it? Duck? Ente? Pato?<br />It's all of those and none of those.<br />It's a bird that swims and goes quack.</i></div>
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I don't expect to need my German and my Spanish in the same place at the same time, but as a result of my discovery, I'm planning on studying German as a Spanish-speaker as well.</div>
Annalisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08247872560777950844noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359486675757920898.post-47190997293013592872015-08-26T19:42:00.001-06:002015-08-26T19:42:20.488-06:00Putting Things on Pause: Day 1,870Activism in Guatemala is pretty strong. People are passionate about their country and their government. This can be a good thing, and it can also be a dangerous thing. For the last 20+ weeks, there have been protests, mostly in the capitol. <br />
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First, they were just about the president and vice president being corrupt. The VP resigned. But as the case opened up more and more, Guatemalans became outraged at the extent of the corruption. Now the protests are against the national elections (and still against the president) which will be held on September 6th. The people do not want elections under these conditions. They want the corruption to be wiped out of Guatemalan politics before making a new start in January 2016.<br />
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And, at this point, the protests are no longer just in the capitol. They are on many different roads in various parts of the country. And so, without having my own vehicle, my handsomer half has asked that I pause my work in Solola. Under normal conditions, I do not feel it is dangerous. (To be fair, I don't feel it's dangerous to <i>me</i> right now either; I'm not a politician nor do I represent nor support any political party.) However, he feels that traveling on public transport could result in me (and fellow passengers) being abandoned on the side of the road in some remote area of the highway between here and Solola.<br />
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So, for now, I'm staying close to home and getting stuff organized. We have been looking at potentially changing houses; although, our eventual hope is to buy land to build on or a house. Just keep us in your prayers, please, especially as my handsomer half works in the capitol.Annalisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08247872560777950844noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359486675757920898.post-18123807670921311072015-07-14T00:17:00.001-06:002015-07-14T00:17:39.652-06:00Doing What You're Called to Do With What You Have: Day 1,827There are days I get frustrated. There are days when I say to myself, "I could do so much more good if I had X." Some days "X" is "a bigger budget." Some days "X" is "more man power." Some days "X" is "a vehicle." Some days "X" is "a large house either owned or rented with a contract." Some days I look at other missions which I deem to be "more successful" than my own which usually means they have one or more of my Xs...and get frustrated because I see them wasting what they have been given. But then I am reminded of a lot of wisdom from various places in my life, some of which I don't even remember the source of.<br />
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1. <i>Be still and know that [God is] God.</i><br />
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2. While many men who have shown a romantic interest in me during the last 5 years have had only one thing on their mind--going to the US--my handsomer half has never had that interest. In fact, he has only changed his mind about that since getting engaged to me because he knows that much of my family cannot or will not travel, and he knows that I want them to meet him. <i>Why</i> is the US of no draw to him? Because he is tired of seeing his countrymen (and women and children) making an expensive and dangerous journey to a far away country all in search of "a better life" which involves sending money to the people they abandoned back home. He wants to prove that a Guatemalan can make it in Guatemala. How does that apply to my situation? Well, I have what I have...and while things of this world could make my ministry easier, Christians aren't necessarily called to an easier life.<br />
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3. Matthew 25:14-30. <i>Brief summary: Rich guy gives his servants various amounts of money to invest for a certain amount of time. Each was given a different amount. Two of them invest the money and double it. The last one hides the money in the ground and gives it back when the master comes back.</i> Sometimes I feel like that last servant. I imagine we all do from time to time. It's a plateau we hit where we doubt our abilities and become content with where we are or become scared of taking that next step. We just want to hold on to what we have and try to not lose that...but that's not the point of life nor the point of ministry.<br />
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4. Getting frustrated because someone isn't using what they have properly won't change my situation any besides giving me high blood pressure and raising my stress levels, and that has never helped anyone. Stress less.Annalisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08247872560777950844noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359486675757920898.post-18995040794926085002015-07-02T18:34:00.000-06:002015-07-02T18:34:39.857-06:00Day 1,815There are some words I hear so very often and <b>hate</b> to hear: <i>I could never do what you do</i>. Now, I know I'm not the only person who has heard those words. I know a few mothers I know have heard those words as well, and I'm sure there are others. And, to be completely honest, I have said those words myself on at least one occasion.<br />
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The fact of the matter is that you could probably do what I do. Sure, it's harder if you have a house, spouse, kids, and a job in the United States (or wherever you happen to live). Sure, it's harder if languages never interested you. Sure, it's harder if...a lot of things.<br />
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The one occasion that I recall saying "I could never do what you do," I was talking to a friend of mine who has twins. I really don't know how she does it. But, you know what? It doesn't matter. She didn't know how to do what she does before God handed her those girls either.<br />
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If you think <i>I could never do what you do,</i> you're probably wrong. You probably have never tried. You probably have never needed to. But when the time comes to step up to the plate (to whatever it is), you will succeed if it is worth it...because failure is not an option.Annalisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08247872560777950844noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5359486675757920898.post-87310806066475527462015-06-30T13:41:00.000-06:002015-06-30T13:41:08.032-06:00Marriage and Culture: Day 1,813<i>Before you decide this has something to do with a certain Supreme Court ruling, it doesn't; although, to some extent, it might have been more on my mind because of recent events in the United States.</i><br />
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In Guatemala, it's common for people to not marry...at least not for a long time. Often, they "unite;" a woman--typically pregnant, sometimes with a baby--moves in with her boyfriend's family. At that point, they start calling each other husband and wife or man and woman. When I mentioned to people that I was engaged, a common response was "Oh, I didn't know you had a baby!" or "When is the baby due?" One family member even went as far to put her hand on my belly and say, "May there be many <i>more</i> blessings!" As a white, conservative (but independent) American, I was mortified. (Please note that what I am about to say is different for each person and is in no way judging anyone else.) To me, a man marrying me after I am pregnant with his child (or having had given birth to it), would border on obligation; I don't want a man to marry me because he feels obligated...or because I feel he feels obligated.<br />
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Here it is different. Many Guatemalans, including my significant other, believe that a baby is a sign that God has given His blessing on the relationship, that this is the person that you are supposed to marry. If a baby isn't born before either of the adults (or teenagers) in the relationship find someone they feel more strongly about, then it is decided that, despite however much sex they have had, the pair wasn't meant to be.<br />
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Handsome (my significant other) took a lot of convincing, but in the end, "I'm pretty sure my father would disown me if I had a baby before getting married" was what did it. Family is important here, and he didn't really want to drive any wedges between myself and my original family. And his mom loves me too even if we don't have a baby, and considering my past track-record with relationships, family and guy both loving me seems like divine blessing enough.Annalisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08247872560777950844noreply@blogger.com0